DEF CON 101 - The Panel

Video thumbnail (Frame 0) Video thumbnail (Frame 1753) Video thumbnail (Frame 2901) Video thumbnail (Frame 3865) Video thumbnail (Frame 4826) Video thumbnail (Frame 6020) Video thumbnail (Frame 9705) Video thumbnail (Frame 12084) Video thumbnail (Frame 14273) Video thumbnail (Frame 16053) Video thumbnail (Frame 19113) Video thumbnail (Frame 20243) Video thumbnail (Frame 22665) Video thumbnail (Frame 24967) Video thumbnail (Frame 26270) Video thumbnail (Frame 28519) Video thumbnail (Frame 29715) Video thumbnail (Frame 32034) Video thumbnail (Frame 36456) Video thumbnail (Frame 38693) Video thumbnail (Frame 40524) Video thumbnail (Frame 41964)
Video in TIB AV-Portal: DEF CON 101 - The Panel

Formal Metadata

DEF CON 101 - The Panel
Title of Series
CC Attribution 3.0 Unported:
You are free to use, adapt and copy, distribute and transmit the work or content in adapted or unchanged form for any legal purpose as long as the work is attributed to the author in the manner specified by the author or licensor.
Release Date

Content Metadata

Subject Area
Ten years ago, DEF CON 101 was founded by HighWiz as a way to introduce n00bs to DEF CON. The idea was to help attendees get the best experience out of DEF CON (and also tell them how to survive the weekend!). The DEF CON 101 panel has been a way for people who have participated in making DEF CON what it is today to share those experiences and, hopefully, inspire attendees to expand their horizons. DEF CON offers so much more than just talks and the DEF CON 101 panel is the perfect place to learn about all things DEF CON so you, dear reader, can get the best experience possible. The panel will end with the time honored tradition of "Name the n00b" where lucky attendees will be brought up on stage to introduce themselves to you and earn the coveted 101 n00b handle. Don't worry if you don't make it on to the stage, there will be plenty of other prizes for you to enjoy!
Energy level
Multiplication sign Bit Instance (computer science)
Slide rule System call Euler angles Block (periodic table) Closed set Multiplication sign Bit Disk read-and-write head Graph coloring Rule of inference Auditory masking Hacker (term) Square number Right angle Data conversion Block (periodic table) Family
Goodness of fit Slide rule Information Multiplication sign Basis <Mathematik> Right angle Wireless LAN Spacetime
Mobile app Slide rule Computer file Hacker (term) Multiplication sign Hacker (term) Disk read-and-write head Number
Reading (process) Mobile app Freeware Source code Planning Online help Differenz <Mathematik> Arithmetic mean Hacker (term) Videoconferencing Cuboid Game theory Hacker (term) Videoconferencing Row (database)
Process (computing) Broadcast programming Hacker (term) Googol Multiplication sign Right angle Whiteboard Hacker (term) System call Number
Area Addition Email Feedback Cryptography System call Virtual machine Information privacy Neuroinformatik Voting Root Different (Kate Ryan album) Computer hardware Reflektor <Informatik> Figurate number Hacker (term) Information security Wireless LAN
Area Event horizon Demo (music) Hacker (term) Demo (music) Uniqueness quantification Motion capture Hacker (term) Event horizon Flag
Inheritance (object-oriented programming) Information Multiplication sign Shared memory Plastikkarte Mereology Bookmark (World Wide Web) 2 (number) Number Local Group Force Type theory Latent heat Coefficient of determination Word Doubling the cube Right angle Freeware Row (database)
Slide rule Internet forum Real number Physical law Order (biology) Electronic mailing list Cartesian closed category Whiteboard Quicksort System call Sinc function God
Multiplication sign 1 (number) Chaos (cosmogony) Mereology Food energy Bookmark (World Wide Web) Bit rate Different (Kate Ryan album) Semiconductor memory Network socket Determinant Information security Fiber (mathematics) Social class God Physical system Decision tree learning Boss Corporation Sampling (statistics) Bit 19 (number) Type theory Arithmetic mean Process (computing) Computer science Right angle Purchasing Laptop Slide rule Backup Identifiability Real number Student's t-test Event horizon Rule of inference Graph coloring Goodness of fit Spreadsheet Internet forum Hacker (term) Alphabet (computer science) Computer-assisted translation Booting Inheritance (object-oriented programming) Demo (music) Information Consistency Plastikkarte Line (geometry) System call Password Radio-frequency identification Musical ensemble Local ring
welcome everyone to the DEFCON diversity panel nobody all right welcome everybody to DEFCON 101 the panel I'm not gonna talk about the level of hate that was just exposed right there so how many people have never been to Def Con before raise your hands all the news welcome and he's actually super exciting to see that many people you know every year Def Con grows I've been coming for since 2002 coming to Def Con parentheses since 2002 since we're not doing phrasing today and every year it gets better about a decade ago highways started DEFCON 101 as a way to kind of introduce people to Def Con and teach them you know what to expect so
first welcome to debt and Las Vegas please pace yourselves that squirrel is for you Jericho oh there's more I don't know how many middle fingers you have seriously for those of you who've never been to Las Vegas before and it can be a little bit overwhelming it's very shiny very distracting so definitely pace yourselves Def Con is a few days so you don't want to shoot your wad on the first day all right not advancing there we go look and this is what I
needed anyway I needed Clippy so we're gonna talk about being a noob everybody's a noob it's something we're all noobs we all consider ourselves noobs and embrace that noob has had a bad connotation for a long time but this is one of those instances where if you're a new that's okay because you shouldn't dgaf don't give a fuck if you're a new that just means that you will have an opportunity to learn and you should take that opportunity to learn so we're gonna talk about the
countdown for surviving Def Con does anybody here familiar with this countdown one or two people yeah up
three two one so seriously take it seriously three get at least three hours sleep a night my first Def Con I spent 16 hours a day in a cait CTF the second year I was here they decided that the CTF was going to run 24 hours a day and I will tell you from experience the it's not fun when you try to fly back to the East Coast and try to adjust your time eat at least two meals a day for those
of you who may have low blood sugar problems or high blood sugar problems make sure that you eat healthy meals a day they offer healthy meals in the chill-out room and for God's sake please
bathe at least once a day it is the desert and you are going to be hot and if you go outside you're gonna sweat you're gonna sweat in the hallways eyes are sweating just get in here so it's kind of kind of challenging so please wash your hands - it was just in the bathroom walked out of the bathroom after washing my hands I watched two people walk right out of the bathroom just go to the bathroom walk right out please I you know I'm not interested in anybody that may have stinky pee hands
so again this is the desert stay hydrated thank you for this slide if your pee is the last color on the right you are in trouble there is an emergency care not too far in care not too far from here so getting back to washing
your hands how many people have been to Def Con before it how many have been to Def Con before and then have had a horrible disease afterwards or during Romer last year you know fist your friends fist them often it's actually kind of funny I have this little square up there about how fisting is 90 percent less likely to relay germs which is kind of funny you know because I also see people when they fist the door to open the bathroom door anyway but please make sure that you practice good hygiene this is dick Dick's a hacker can you tell Dick's a hacker he's got a bad attitude might be Jericho under that ski mask basically I'm gonna give you guys some rules some some things that I think are basic guidelines that you should focus on and try to make your Def Con experience a little bit better so the first one here are the basics hold the door open don't let a door close on somebody it's just plain rude and keep your head up I know that a lot of you would be shocked to know that there are a lot of people walking around on their phones not paying attention in fact they probably walk right into you so pay attention as well keep your head up pay attention and don't block the hallway the hallway is not the place to hold a family reunion if you run into somebody that you haven't seen in a long time and you want to have a conversation with them take it off to the side these hallways are tiny so please make try and make it a little bit easier for people do not I repeat do
not be an asshat don't ruin people's time you're here DEFCON to learn you're here at DEFCON to have a good time and DEF CON is both of those things it is fun and educational but there are going to be those people on occasion that are going to ruin it for everybody if you see somebody harassing somebody speak up or if you're not comfortable speaking up grab one of our red shirt goons if you see somebody that is just straight up being drunk and belligerent same thing these are not circumstances where you need to deal with it you don't want it to ruin other people's time and nobody should just turn a blind eye to it please don't heckle you can heckle at this one this is interactive you can if you want to say rude stuff you can these guys will shortly but please don't heckle the the other speakers excuse me it's a Def Con tradition to heckle really these Statler and Waldorf thank you please don't heckle if you disagree with something speak with the speaker afterwards you might be surprised at you don't know something that that speaker may actually have information and you may learn something if you want to speak with that speaker afterwards but just don't please don't just scream in the middle of any of anybody's talk not all
hugs are accepted so but I will say like Jericho heckled us so much at a panel one time that we said fuck it just brought him up and put him on the panel so that you may if you want to be a speaker maybe hoechlin is the way to go that it might be give it a shot see how how well that works out for you my seats available for 20 also else what you do I think is the first year that we've had those like monitors that in the middle of the room I looked up and like we see the back of it from up here I'm like why the fuck is this in Spanish [Laughter] I'm just making sure that you guys are done we can keep get real okay all right you carry on anyway so please you know respect other people's space if you know somebody and you you hug them on a regular basis obviously hug them if you see somebody and this is the first time you've met them you might want to reconsider all right phones and wireless
everybody's got a phone so seriously this is a hacker convention chances are you need to use your head disable your wireless if you need to play please don't connect to his wireless anyway anybody did you hear the horror stories about oh you got to get a burner phone burner phones still have wireless if they're hooked up to all your apps and everything it's still is still gonna mess you up so use your head along with that pictures everybody's
phone has a camera so you will be in a picture again geez take that into account I can't tell you the number of times that I've just walked down the hall and watched people with their cameras up above their heads their phones up above their heads filming everything so if you don't want to be in a picture that's cool you can put a hand over your face you can buy one of those crazy IR visors pyro had them last year or you could just simply say please delete that file
their game another squirrel not everything is free it was kind of funny this morning because I was watching that some people were walking around and just sorting through boxes and there that's not your stuff so if you see something that doesn't mean that it's free it doesn't mean that you can pick it up so please make sure they just be a good citizen that one I can't really say too much about this so who wants some free stuff you want to do that now whoa whoa these will put an eye out so cover your eyes when he throws [Applause] [Laughter] all of you guys in the front rows we're gonna kill you back do you know who Gallagher is there there will be more stuff thrown drink responsibly son I have these guys to mess things up just when the when things are getting boring okay let's go back to have a plan
anybody was that was in here before our talk heard about hacker tracker and hacker tracker is an awesome app it's gonna help you out also try to plan use your programs and try to identify where you want to be because you're not going to be able to be everywhere so the source of knowledge are they still called the source of knowledge Nikita all right there the sound of knowledge ts okay it doesn't matter they're going to be somewhere where you'll be able to buy the videos so don't freak out if you can't make it to the next talk it's gonna be okay you guys will all be okay and there we
go I already blew it talked about hacker trap nice job Mike premature yeah sorry
alright so the talks there are a lot of really good talks I am on the call for papers review board I don't know who else wants to admit it but if you see one of these orange badges that's what that means spent 800 alleyway isn't this the CFPB - yeah remember the panel is on the poll I didn't know if everybody wanted to admit it I'm not not anymore so we spent a lot of time it's it's essentially a half a part-time job and then it becomes a full-time job right before the end of all the talks being accepted we spend a lot of time trying to figure out which talks are going to be good which talks are not we get talks upwards Blob well beyond 550 talks that are submitted 543 5-1 doesn't matter he won the bet so he's sticking with the number even though the number changed really I won the bet because the thoughts were pulled no no I no no no honestly honestly cuz on Basecamp I created the post and then I changed your number and that's how I won the bet anyway so we take a lot of pride in the talks hopefully you guys are gonna have a good time
villages there are as you can see quite a few villages and villages have grown back up step if you attend to talk and you really like it or really dislike it please give feedback yes just email talks at Def Con dot org okay lots of villages villages are awesome because you get it goes beyond a talk villages actually give you an opportunity to get hands-on experience with a lot of the the different aspects and I've highlighted a few here the ICS village they've grown and this is an area of interest if you're trying to figure out where you want to go in computer security and hacking there is a dearth of people that can do do ICS hacking so you might want to consider that we have the blue team village which is brand new this year if you're thinking that your defensive-minded the blue team village would be for you lockpick village is always cool because that's an opportunity for people to learn how to pick locks and who doesn't need to pick a lock every once in a while sorry that's I was hearing whispering next to me and then there's soldering skills village which probably will come in handy with these badges in addition
there are workshops these workshops are truly hands-on oftentimes the workshops are filled up well in advance but this is something to look for in the future the workshops are just like the call for papers we go through how many of those do we have one hundred and something hundred and something anyway then it's one of those opportunities for people to take sit down and actually learn cryptography they can learn blockchain many other birds buzzwords and then you get an opportunity to actually do the work every single instructor actually does work and they are all instructor-led labs they are not lectures on the other side of that there
are demo labs demo labs we've got contest we've got events there is a lot of stuff that happens at Def Con that is why we are as big as we are that is why we are across Las Vegas Boulevard because Def Con is as big as it is quite honestly there truly is too much for us to list with regards to contests and events for the demo labs it's an opportunity to actually see some of these tools that people are releasing so highways did you have something you would like to and an additional event oh the queer con stuff yeah yeah if you anybody gay here I'm being serious I have three queer con passes if you want to give someone wants to come up and get them they'll get yeah yeah yeah come on up first three to make it yeah first three start pushing look she even came with a rainbow on her shirt with the rainbow on the shirt I'm gay I can't throw all right here's an area that everybody
loves to take advantage of swaggin vendors vendors opens tomorrow swag was open today this is where you get all your Def Con stuff whether you get Def Con branded stuff or the vendors is a an actual vendor hall it was actually started DEFCON 4 right Roemer sure okay and then Romer took it over shortly after and it became this awesome thing but vendors at the vendor hall every vendor that's in there offers something to the hacker community it may be commercial but if they offer something to the hacker community rolling its
hopefully the mic is too far away he doesn't have an opportunity to oh no I was trolling Shaggy surprised most I've lost half the crowd you are droning on and on the fucking drone village up here I forget we're getting close the drone village I liked it yeah he's been paying attention all right Terra wheeler van black she said this about a week ago two weeks ago maybe anyone worth knowing has impostor syndrome one of the things it's very difficult as a being in this industry is hanging out with a bunch of really smart people and feeling like you're dumb well you know that happens you're we're all smart but we're all noobs too so if you're hanging out with these guys who I'm humbled to hang out with because of how smart they are some of the people in the front row over here too you know it's it's challenging especially when they start talking about stuff and I'm like yep I watched football but it's alright because just remember that if you're hanging out with those people you're hanging out with them for a reason you're not just the guy who pays for pizza every single time or you know the one who can buy beer they're hanging out with you for a specific reason cuz you're attractive alright so we're
getting close to the end for those of you who are excited about getting close to the end of this I am going to issue a double dog dare I'm skipping right over the dare part double dog dare you reach out I want you to put yourself out there and I want you to find someone that you that you share something that you share I want you where actually to take a minute right now probably gonna be more than a minute because there's gonna be a lot of talking introduce yourself to your neighbors Mike did you say find someone to share with I know that the word whiff came out introduce yourself come on seriously in the night I see a lot of people shaking hands I remember to fist your friends not shake their hands alright awesome now that you have 2,000 new friends this is an opportunity free hey guys seriously Murr Murr Murr Murr Murr Murr Murr Murr everybody stop introducing yourself now everybody Romer would like to say something I don't know what but actually I do want to say something I'm mesmerized by this fucking for the Deaf people thing so I always have to do it because essentially I'm a 12 year old so just give me two seconds this one's a shit fuck Satan death sex drugs just cuz I love watching them fucking have to type it it's just it gives me joy and glee oh yeah fucking forgot Satan he's my favorite alright guys sell down please or else in this room after this talk there will be a party you will have an opportunity to talk to you all your friends when that happens okay cool I'm really excited actually the number of people that it took the time to talk and introduce yourselves you be shocked at how good that is gonna work out for you getting to know people getting an opportunity to exchange information to share people or share with people you will have an opportunity to actually expand your knowledge really quick it's great to know that you're that open now
here we go I'm gonna go ahead and up the ante do something that you have never done before go try one of the villages go to a party I know where you were headed with that crazy moronic come on no no it's Vegas what happens in Vegas stays in Vegas if it's illegal don't get caught at con at least yes that please okay I should they should have been more specific when you do something that you have never done before please don't do things that are illegal it is DEFCON hack the law so I would like to see a show of hands people who are really nervous people who have never been here before by themselves and are uncomfortable introducing themselves show hands come on this won't target it's not a target come on those those elbows Bend I see a few you try it really seriously reach out at the very least you can come up here and you can talk to the panel personally I'm you know get scared to death to do that so it'll be hi how you doing on Mike uncomfortable silence thank God
prevented that that you were fast too alright so I'd like to introduce you to the panel as we go down they did not sit in the order that I have on the slide so if they could raise their hands high winds the moderator wasn't here at the start of this when we sat down to tell us where to go I don't think he should blame us the next one down is Jericho next down is sucky these people's real names are that you can sitting next to sub E is Romer sitting next to Romer is Nikita and definitely not the least is shaggy every single one of these people since they've already mentioned it is on the call for papers Review Board there are many other members of the call for papers review board but we are happy to account to talk about that as well afterwards we can give you advice on how to submit a talk how you know you that your talk will immediately get declined you know those sort of things long list it's a long list one of the other things that I
brought up to start this is our tenth anniversary so what we are gonna do here this is the last Def Con 101 panel it's okay because next year we're gonna do the DEF CON 101 Village there's enough because if there's one thing Def Con needs is more villages what was that because Def Con definitely needs more villages they do need more villages so other thing that the interesting thing is there are enough events and things that just don't make it but for news Nikita does not approve a Def Con 101 village did you say oh yeah we did not tell her before we put that slide up we were thus the dropping the bomb thing okay so we have a tradition and this will be the last one named that noob
having a hacker handle is something of an honour right most people have one for themselves that they picked out or that they were given like if you're shaggy six nine four three five five one because there were 66 thousand other Shaggy's ahead of you there are lots of other other ways to get handles but earning a handle is a great way to do it I'm going to tell you a quick story and I'm disappointed because my friend is not here but oftentimes handles are earned by not doing something smart so I have a friend that Romer and I used to work with many years ago and his handle is wad and he hates that handle he tried a lot of different ways to get rid of that handle he even tried calling him rogue tracker oh nice tracker that was but he spelled it wrong so it was Rouge tracker which of course which of course made it worse but hid so he got the handle first by we had to give a very important demo and we his job was to type in the password and he chose to type in password but he left the are out twice so he was passed WOD for quite a quite a bit of time and then we went to a club a that had a lot of black lights and what kind of club with him like it was a club that involved dancing can you show us how they danced this is after after the party and he had a shirt on that we're gonna go ahead and say the tide had not completely washed out of that shirt and Romer asked him why he wore his wad shirt to the club and he was WOD ever since and he still his wad I say all of this and I tell you this story because it's for fun when somebody gets a handle we don't call you red button because that's a really bad thing to be called we call you red button because you shouldn'ta press the red button you know and we are going to pick on you a little bit it's not we're not gonna call anybody any bad names or anything like that if this is all in good fun and you're you're you should plan on using your handle from here forward so shaggy is our ambassador I'm gonna have shaggy go out into the crowd pick out 25 people and we're going to limit it to 25 people all right how is this going to go out - they need a handle they need a handle that want a handle and I really am encouraging people that are not used to doing this people that are might be a little bit introverted looking for a handle and hopefully it'll happen quicker than this does this signify that the droning of mic is coming to an end like just because we have two and a half hours for this doesn't mean you may need to make it feel like an eternity okay you know well while they're identifying some people to come up here I'm actually going to ask the panel a couple of questions because this is what I was supposed to do in the first place so thank god this is the last one hey Nikita Nikita what's your favorite part of Def Con my favorite part of Def Con actually believe it or not the consistency and that may seem a little unusual because it is such a chaotic event but to me the chaos is consistency and the ability to see all of the people that I love the most every year I can count on that and I can count on this show and I can count on the energy and all these people raising their hands and being excited just wanted to be at Def Con and that's what I love the most the consistency of the show I love that the most I think that's awesome hey Romer what's your favorite part of Def Con flight home I really drink a lot I don't have that many memories of death that is true but um I don't know I mean that's really difficult this is the 19th deaf college I've been to so there's a lot of memories over that time there's a lot of good ones and there's a lot of really shitty ones too but I was ok I guess probably if I had to like nail down my problem I favorite memory is was it's like selfish which makes sense cuz I'm severely egotistical narcissistic but I would say probably doing the the goon bandit three or three party I did mention it but I'll mention it again if you're not one of the lucky people in this line come see us afterwards we're happy to listen to you we're happy to talk to you we're happy to pick on you and give you a handle there are some prizes so you might want to consider it again I'll put it out there for people that have coins at one exchange you might find that one of the noobs in this line has a coin not everybody will we're going to see how good the stories are to make a determination so hold on alright sorry one more quick thing I was starting to feel really bad because I'm not bullshitting I'm totally mesmerized by that thing but every time I look at it Nikita thinks I'm gazing into her eyes [Laughter] so guys here's here's how this is going to go what we're looking for from you and the panel is going to ask also what we're looking for you from you is things that people don't know about you tell us some information I don't want to know if you have more than two cats or you know if your favorite color is purple those are the things that everybody knows tell us something that people don't know something that we're going to be able to try and identify something that's going to make you stand out and make you you and I am happy that you are the first person come on up I want your secrets hey we got a real moderator nikohl Florida okay Nicole what brought you to DEFCON come here a lot so I just came to see it what are you most looking forward to doing at Def Con this year uh I do find it very fascinating I want to learn whatever I can in these few days all right so tell us something dude people don't know about you hmm how about that I just came up with my own alphabet just for fun we need to hear it oh yeah sing it tell us something embarrassing come on oh let's see here not really [Laughter] yeah as far as what people wouldn't know it I'm kind of we know your handle we know your handle already it's improv hey everybody say hi to improv alright next next victim oh yeah go ahead good they introduce yourself what's your name where are you from hi I'm Andy I'm originally from Pittsburgh but I live in Seattle now okay yeah so what's next [Music] hmmm alright so I'm pretty big in the sports but the biggest sports related injury I've ever had was I got smashed between two golf carts it was pretty bad what are your favorite sport what's your favorite sport team and least favorite sport team ooh favorite sport team probably the Pittsburgh Penguins five times Stanley Cup champion least favorite sports team as opposed to you six times Super Bowl champion Pittsburgh Steelers oh thank you thank you for that I forgot least favorite probably the Philadelphia Flyers okay get some class for that I'm good with that that's my job to send me here and they were like yeah and I was like very fucking serious why did you ask why do you want to come um I think you know just the overall experience I've heard so much through the grapevine from friends who have come to this conference before and just the overall experience and just wanted to dive in try it take it all in do you actually wait you want to dive in and take it all in yes that's what I heard yeah my background is in the information security Huck is your handle huh yeah I'll take it I was down he passed it down years seriously nice alright hold on a second alright you know the routine cool my name is max Doolin I'm a student at Gonzaga University and I cannot believe we got they're giving us funding to come to this conference right now this is Jupiter now how stupid is that gosh I'm a skier sports guy I play competitive dodgeball and competitive bull football yes yes P na Deok show I got a bad injury I was coaching Babe Ruth baseball and I took a ball of the face and cracked a bunch of my eye socket it was pretty nasty if you want to see I can show you pictures later it's pretty funny ok ok we've all got hit in the face with lots of balls alright so I have got dumped on valent the day before Valentine's Day not once but twice I bought chocolates both times not a good thing strike out I like it strike out I did not want that to be your embarrassing story okay hi I am Eva from New York anyone else my name is ava and I'm from New York City State is very different I just graduated college so I wanted to learn more about security computer science where'd you go Brooklyn College CUNY anyone no one's there from New York I do want to know what your favorite color is and why I love blue we have we have a sample here yeah I'm all blue today I love there it's very calming now you're clearly quite agitated so um what can we be friends who said that Nikita yes hi I think I seen you somewhere on a panel on a stage maybe call you mellow yeah hey I'm Jeffrey go buy J blend I can out nerd anybody in this room what J blends way what what yeah why'd you cut yeah get off the stage well but I'm looking to revamp that but I can owner anybody about Japanese and the last time I was on stage in front of this many people I had I just learned salsa in Cuba and I fell off the stage because there was wrong involved yes anybody about Japan do you have rum now like that I mean I don't have any room right now but I yeah I'm trained for this event growing up near New Orleans because I you know we start drinking early yeah I'm from 504 - you're not doing your handle one of the rules was if you have a handle don't come up on stage okay so you got any of you guys have handles anyway hold on jaylen parting gift Thanks my boss called me Jalen cuz he couldn't say my name okay cool story bro great story okay salutations my name's Dan I'm from Detroit me too chop chop oh wow embarrassing or not embarrass embarrassing all right about a month ago I went to a Slayer concert and entered my first mosh pit and got knocked to my ass lost my glasses and didn't purchase anymore or any new glasses for like three weeks until a Marilyn Manson concert and I found a backup pair of glasses and lost the had the exact same thing happened lost my glasses again now I just got these yesterday further conference make sure I can see and they're too small in my ears hurt it's about it all right this panel fuck marry kill fuck marry kill oh you tell us yeah this panel ah what there's four of you can you get multiple right just pick 300 all of them but just pick three and fuck marry kill who would you fuck who would you marry who would you kill all right I like your boots well I'll fuck this guy we can we can rub dudes together it might be pretty awesome you probably make the most money so I'll marry you and kill you asked me to do this so I'll kill you [Applause] sigh damn we were gonna call him dinner you know ok didi crack didi crack from Detroit everybody please say hi to didi crack hey everyone my name is thigh looking forward to handle it people actually can pronounce and I don't have to explain my name every time I'm from Vegas any locals here no no besides the people I came with any locals no okay oh hey tell us something funny about yourself funny I came something embarrassing not something funny all right well tell us something embarrassing I guess so I don't know if this particularly embarrassing but I don't talk about myself a lot so I guess one thing that people don't know about me is that I really like cheese I'm also known for taking a lot of notes and I'm very particular so I actually have a notebook where I documented the cheese that I've eaten and I have a personal rating system for it listen noob get into spreadsheets okay that's where it's at no I you have to bring the notebook to take notes while you're eating the cheese and then you go back home and you enter in the spreadsheet okay yeah the last spreadsheet I created was about tracking jalapeno poppers in Denver and which restaurants have the best okay I'm not that's amazing I'm not alone then all right name but pepper jack I've never met a cheese I don't like I guess I don't I don't know I serious I've never had cheese I don't like everybody say hi to from under thank you all right by the way you guys can help with when we're naming them if you have ideas shout him out all right hello everyone my name is Craig I'm from Washington DC my most embarrassing thing I cut a I used to work for the UN and I caught a fiber line and knocked out 750,000 users Central Africa and president of World Bank wanted my resignation everybody say hi to blackout [Applause]