Is that what I should do? This is the third appearance of international reform. Absolutely. What I've never done, and I've introduced Andrew before, is point out the thing you're seeing on the screens and these, Andrew's built this himself.

It's not just a feat of presenting, this is also a feat of engineering. So ladies and gentlemen, please welcome... us... Thank you for that.

It's not really well-prepared introduction, Andy Krom. Okay, I need to do something here, okay, I'm going to go... Good afternoon RubyConf! 800 people in the room, I think I heard about 700, that'll do. Okay, my name's Andrew Faraday, and here's how the game works.

Actually no, it's only been a little while. We're going to play the game for just a minute. Now this is where we get to see the Ruby community at play. It is not your typical conference panel. We're just going to have some fun, and that means you are very much a part of the experience we're about to have. So you have my permission, RubyConf, to react. That means laugh if you want to laugh, cheer if you want to cheer, cry if you want to cry.

Yeah, one thing I'm going to have to ask for you, I'm going to start the game in the traditional way in a short while, I'm going to boisterously welcome you to the show, and the theme music is going to come in. Now as soon as you hear that piano, I need you all to put your hands together,

raise your voices, and raise this rather beautiful conference room roof. Can you do that for me? Here we go! Welcome to Just A Minute!

Welcome to a very special edition of Just A Ruby Minute here in the fine city of New Orleans. Here's how the game works. Each round I'll pick a topic that's of some interest to Ruby developers, and one of the witty, insightful, and currently terrified people currently arrayed before you, and ask them to speak about that topic for a total of 60 seconds.

Sounds easy, but they must avoid three restrictions on how they speak. They must avoid hesitation, including pauses and hedging noises, repetition where they repeat the repetition of an early repeat, or deviation where they're simply no longer talking about the topic I have given them. Now if the other panelists discover these rules being broken, they can challenge by pressing their buzzers, the timer will stop,

and if their challenge is correct, they will gain a point and also control the topic, so I'll have to speak about that topic where the timer left off until the minute is over, or they are in turn challenged. Incorrect challenges give a point back to the original speaker, and whoever's speaking at the end of a minute gains a point for doing so. Whoever has the most points at the end of the game wins bragging rights, basically.

And that's how the game works. So let's meet the panel without any further ado. Furthest from me we have the COO of Coding Zeal, and the dirtiest player in the history of the game. Please welcome Adam Cuppy.

Next up to his right we have the creator of the one and only Goat User Stories. Please welcome Tara Shurna de la Fuente. Next up to his right we have the organizer of Britain's Brighton Ruby Conference, and writer of One Ruby Thing.

Please welcome Andy Kroll. And last but by no means least, we have a developer of Digital Ocean, our spec maintainer, and a true Ruby Jam veteran. He's been with us since the very first Just A Ruby Minute panel. Please welcome Sam Phippen. Boo! Boo!

Wow! I think round negative one is the... That is a record, and Sam you are first up to speak. Your topic's pretty meta actually, speaking at a Ruby conference. Sam Phippen on speaking at a Ruby conference without hesitation, repetition, or deviation, starting now.

Right now, what I am doing is speaking at a Ruby conference. I spend a lot of my time speaking at Ruby conferences, such as this Ruby conference that we are currently at.

When many people are speaking at a Ruby conference, they come together to speak at a Ruby conference about topics involving Ruby and conferences. Thank you very much.

As much as I enjoyed that. Repetition of conferences. Yeah, he's right. Definitely 100%. Quite a lot of hesitation as well. So Andy, you have 28 seconds remaining, starting now. In my experience of speaking at a Ruby conference, it is unremittingly terrifying to a degree that is unsurprising to those of you who saw my talk this morning,

where I... speaking at a Ruby conference... Hesitation. Hesitation, absolutely. Tara, you have 16 seconds remaining, starting now. When I am speaking at a Ruby conference, I like to talk about things I know,

like cats and goats and walruses. Repetition of and a lot in the list. Pretty harsh, but there was four answers. I have managed not to curse. I count this a win. So, Andy, you have six seconds remaining, starting now.

When speaking at a Ruby conference, it is very important that you keep your language... Adam? Repetition of your. Absolutely. Did anyone hear you? Boo.

Sam has nothing to do with this. If I get to boo someone else, then like... You can't call them by your nickname. I'm going to call that an incorrect challenge. Andy, you gain the point. You have zero seconds remaining. And a point for the end of that minute.

Repetition of silence. Okay, Adam, you are next up to speak. Interesting topic. You have coders in movies. This is Adam Cuppy. Coders in movies. He's puzzled. Starting now. For starters, coders in movies is a myth.

There are, in fact, no coders in movies, because most movies center around a protagonist and an antagonist that know very little about coding in movies themselves. Instead, what we look at is the insightful nature of coders in movies

and how they think through a problem to find a better and more ideal solution to solve a world against robots and chickens. That was a very elongated pause there, so I'm going to call it hesitation. That was definitely a hesitation. It was 30 seconds. I was clearing my throat.

I mean, 32 seconds is a good start. Okay, Sam, you have 28 seconds remaining on coders in movies starting now. I think when we programmers observe coders in movies, we very quickly realize how ridiculous coders... Repetition of we?

Hey, he said I was the dirty old boy. Come on now. Now if this surprises you? A two-count is not enough on a connecting word. Fine. There was two we's, and I noticed Adam has not had any points yet, so I'm going to give you that one.

So, Adam, you have 21 seconds starting now. Like I was saying, coders in movies are vastly different from the rest of the people in movies. Repetition of people from his earlier speech.

Yeah, got to give you that one. I got this. I got this. So, Sam, you have 14 seconds remaining starting now. The thing about coders in movies is that often in movies they portray a very inaccurate depiction of coders

who typically don't conduct practices like typing very quickly with two humans on a cube. That's Sam gaining a point, currently in a joint lead. Okay, Tara, you're next. Your topic is visiting New Orleans.

This is Tara Cerna de la Fuente, even, on visiting New Orleans starting now. I am currently visiting New Orleans where I have been speaking at a Ruby conference about things that are not goats. Earlier I talked about mentoring and...

Hesitation. Definitely hesitation. Well, I knew it yesterday when I was speaking at Ruby conference. I have still not cursed. Still a win. Well done. Andy, you have 45 seconds on this subject starting now.

Visiting New Orleans has been an eye-opening experience for me. Walking the streets of the French Quarter, eating beignet, which, as far as I can tell, are just a bunch of icing sugar on top of a donut. But the levels of sweetness are beyond anything I could possibly have imagined in my wildest dreams of the Louisiana countryside.

So visiting New Orleans is a thing that has surprised me because I have been to the Museum of Death, which is an actual, genuine tourist attraction, and you would be surprised about the stuff that's in there. Repetition of surprise. Did anyone here surprised? Surprised and surprised.

Surprising and surprised are two separate words. Boo! Boo! I feel like that's an unpopular challenge. Either that or you're coming after in support of Sam. I'm not sure. I have to give Andy the point there. Have to?

Well, I'm going to. Okay, so Andy, you have 12 seconds starting now. Visiting New Orleans, there's elements of voodoo in the culture, and there's a tiny house which is in Bourbon Street, where you can go and see the shrunken heads and the voodoo dolls.

Let me say voodoo again. Andy, getting away with the repetition of voodoo there. And, Andy, you're actually up next to start speaking. Hesitation? Your topic is asking for help.

So this is Andy Croll, I'm asking for help starting now. I feel like this very moment I am asking for help. I've been talking quite a lot today, and this is RubyConf, not AndyConf. It doesn't make any sense that I would still be up here talking. Repetition of talking and bleh.

Definitely both those repetitions, Tara, you have the points. And you have 49 seconds starting now. Here at RubyConf, I have been asking for help from a variety of people, like my friends, colleagues, patriots, and things I can't-

Hesitation? Yeah, no kidding, I just, I wasn't ready for this. Still haven't cursed. Well done. So Sam, you have asking for help, 39 seconds starting now. As I sit here on this stage desperately asking for help at this conference,

I mean, what are we all doing here? What does it all mean in the grand- Yes, yep, yes. Repetition of what? And all, and mean, and mean. So Andy, you have 29 seconds starting now.

Asking for help is a thing that we should all do when we are having troubles in our lives. We may not feel that we can talk to people about the things in our- Hesitation? There was hesitation. All kinds of problems.

Most kinds are wrong. So Sam, you have 21 seconds. I can tell you want this subject back starting now. I guess I'm saying I'm building towards an existential crisis and sat here asking for help at this Ruby conference. Repetition of Ruby conference. Yeah, I know.

Andrew, it's clear by the points that my buzzer is not working. Do you really want to test it? No. Hesitation? Andy, you have 12 seconds starting now.

I feel like my fellow panelists might be asking for help. For example, Adam Coppi just now reached across to Andrew Faraday and said- What's the D one? Deviation. I mean, is he still not asking for help?

What do you reckon? He only has one point. On the bright side, my buzzer works. Your buzzer does work. Yeah, I'm going to give you the point. Just feel like- You're welcome, Adam. You have 3.9 seconds starting now.

Asking for help comes down to asking someone else for help. And another point straight in at third. Thank you for your support. I feel like we're following the theme even more. Sam, you're up next to speak. Your topic is Ruby dying.

Something about the keynotes at those conferences. Alright. I'm sorry, Ruby conference. So you have 60 seconds starting now. My good friend Sean Griffin and his wife Tess are sitting in the front row here. Their child named Ruby is currently-

Deviation. Not at all. I buzzed before the mention of the child's name. The child? I am referring to it in the context of which I buzzed. Not a chance. I'm referring to it in the context of which I buzzed.

I feel like it's probably not quite, although I also don't really want to- I'm just desperate for points. It was an incorrect challenge, but I don't want to let Sam keep talking. Could you please give me a point? No. That was clearly on topic. It was on topic. For those of you who don't know the child in question, his name's Ruby.

Repetition of goats? Fear of the wrath of that part of the audience there. I'm going to give Tara the point. I really hope your child isn't dying. Ruby is thriving. I even apologized to the conference before I did it. Come on.

You've got Matt sitting right in front of you. Tara, you have 52 seconds. Is Ruby dying starting now? When we ask is Ruby dying, it's important not to bring up the potential death of children. Especially if one is on stage in front of parents. There was a hesitation when everyone laughed.

Because it's a hard topic. That was not a hesitation. It is a difficult, challenging topic to discuss, Sam. I don't know why you would fuss. That was very natural and fluid, Paul. She did start promptly. Yes, I am going to call that an incorrect challenge.

Tara, you have the point. You have 45 seconds starting now. As I was saying about Ruby dying, which is a very difficult topic to discuss here on stage, I would like to remind us that we are all dying. Straight up deviation, yo.

It was about dying. It was about dying. You kind of deviated from Ruby language or name to everyone. I think I made a very nice transition. As I mentioned in my talk yesterday, I almost got a PhD in English.

You're admitting you've changed the topic by making a transition. So, Adam, correct challenge. You have 33 seconds starting now. Part of the reason why Ruby might not be dying is because it wasn't written in English. BEEP!

I mean, it was lovely and dramatic. This is a disaster. It was a lovely, lovely call.

I'm definitely going to give you that point. I don't know. 45 seconds starting now. It's a question we've been asking ourselves today. Is Ruby dying? In fact, death has been a subject in both of the keynotes. I mean, he just did it. There was definitely hesitation.

There was also deviation because we've had three keynotes so far. Sam, you have the point. You have 18 seconds starting now. So, anyway, let's get technical. The question of is Ruby dying, I think, comes down to an idea that's going around the community about the direction of whether or not Ruby is dying,

specifically to do with how our technology is scaling against the background of other programming languages. So, I'm getting a point for the end of that round. That was actually quite a useful speech there. Yeah, it was good. That was actually useful.

Unusually helpful things to say. You know, sometimes, just occasionally, come to my talk tomorrow, maybe. I like your confidence there. Maybe. So, Adam, you're next up to speak at the start of the round. Your topic, error messages. This is Adam Cuppy on error messages starting now.

I am very well aware of error messages, not only in my code but in my own life. For starters, oh, about two minutes ago, I think I had a total system failure. It wasn't something that I was overly familiar with, but it reminded me of a time in which I was writing Ruby, and the error messages I was receiving reminded me of...

He's doing well about hesitation again. Do you reckon that was hesitation? No, I'm not going for that. So, I'm going to give Andy the point. We have... Andy, you have 39 seconds starting now. Error messages. I'm so familiar with error messages.

I'm sure that you are all very familiar artists. I was being so smart. Repetition of familiar. Repetition of familiar, yes. You have 33 seconds on the topic of error messages starting now. When I am receiving error messages,

I like to take it as an opportunity to learn about the system upon which my team is working. Those error messages can often indicate an underlying error in the system, such as how it is processing... Yeah. What's your challenge? I'm going with repetition of system.

I'm going with that right there. So, what's your challenge? Repetition of system. Yes, repetition of system, absolutely. Tari, you have 16 seconds. Starting now. When I think about error messages,

I often think about the number that they start with, like 401, 402... Repetition of four, I know. Darn it! That seemed so smart when I was thinking about it earlier. I mean, it's traditional to let someone else challenge you, but yes, it was repetition of four.

I know, I know, but I still have not cursed. I'm going to give you that point, Sam. Very easy. You didn't have to say anything, basically. Just great. You have eight seconds, starting now. Error messages indicate things about the tools upon which developers work, such as the error message...

So that's Sam speaking at the end of the minute, gaining a point and tying for the lead. Repetition of boo. Okay, Tari, you are up next to speak. Your topic is hiring developers.

It's Tari Sherna de la Fuente on hiring developers, starting now. Hiring developers is a very complicated process that results in a lot of trauma for the developers who are being hired. One of the things that begins the process... Repetition of process. Oh, I have an idea.

I'm just talking. Had to think back then. Yes, so that's correct, Sam. You gained a point. You have 48 seconds on hiring developers, starting now. Hiring developers is something that I'm currently doing. I have... He's pitching.

Absolutely. Deviation from the game into a pitch. No one likes someone pitching from the stage. I mean... I was going to talk about my experiences interviewing, but... No, no. I'm on board with that. It's not technically breaking the rules of just a minute, however.

I enjoyed that so much, I'm going to give you a point, Andy. However, I'm going to let Sam keep on speaking. So you have 44 seconds, Sam, starting now. Well, that's unprecedented, but anyway. One of the experiences I'm having interviewing many developers is that I have to ask them questions

about the backgrounds that they have, where they've been developers before, how they've hired... I was going to let two days go by, but three is repetition. That's a problem. And how, as well. Yeah, it's fine.

You're in charge, Boo. So Tari, you have 29 seconds on hiring developers, starting now. When I was in human resources, I wasn't hiring developers. I was working for the Boston Symphony Orchestra, where I was hiring musicians and people who did benefits coordination.

Often I had to read resumes full of errors, like, I am a sign language interrupter. Do you know what that means? That means you run... Repetition of means? But this was a good story. It was a good story. You ruined it. You're never going to know.

I mean, I love the story, but it was deviation about 20 seconds ago. Sam, yes, you get the point. You'll have eight seconds, starting now. When I am hiring developers, I like to consider the developer's resume... Repetition of resume?

Nope. From before? I didn't say resume once. Does anyone know? I mean, I hate to stand up for him, but... I feel really bad about him. Because I would say CV because I'm European, but I was using it to not repeat myself from earlier. He's so clever.

I can't remember it being any earlier in your speech, so I'm going to call that an incorrect challenge. Sam, you've got the point. You have 1.4 seconds, starting now. Hiring developers. Sam, they're taking a strong lead.

I think we're going to have to make this the last round today. So, Andy, you're next up to speak. Your topic is managing dependencies. Just a nice, easy one to go out on. So that's Andy Kroll on managing dependencies, starting now. There are many ways to think about managing dependencies. There's Bundler or Gem Files.

Repetition of Gem Files? Yep. Absolutely. What? That was an incorrect challenge. Oh, dang. Andy, you've got the topic back.

With 56 seconds remaining, starting now.

Managing dependencies is a thing that we do in computer science. Repetition of do? That's not going to work. An incorrect challenge. Oh, darn.

Andy, you have 51 seconds remaining, starting now. One of the things about managing... Repetition of things.

Sounds like repetition of things. I don't think I did say that twice. I think I've only said that once. Things. Did I actually say it twice? Oh, God. Did I just get one right? This is not working, how are you putting this? I'm pretty sure that was a correct challenge.

Congratulations, Adam. You have 49 seconds, starting now. Adam was hesitating.

I think he was. This is more fun than just playing the game. I'm enjoying this. So Sam has 15 points and Andy has 15 points? That's true. I'm winning the last round.

So Andy, you have 48 seconds remaining, starting now. One of the things about... Repetition of goats. An incorrect challenge. Andy, 47 seconds now. It's very important when you're doing a talk on stage to manage the dependencies.

Hesitation. Another incorrect challenge. Andy, 42, starting now. Like, keynote is a dependency of when you're giving a talk. You're looking at...

Repetition of talk. Yes, correct. Listen up, team. We've got to double down. I have done 38 seconds before, but... I'm not sure what's happening today. I'll find out. So Sam, you are currently in second place. 38 seconds remaining on managing dependencies, starting now.

When I think about managing dependencies, there are many programming languages that I could go to, such as Golang, Ruby, Rust, Perl, C, JavaScript, Java, Assembly, Fortran, COBOL...

That would have been really good. That was hesitation, but it was really good. I enjoyed that. It was impressive. And hopefully your last time speaking.

Geez, I hate when Mum and Dad fight. So Andy, you have 21 seconds, starting now. Managing dependencies utilizes a system of... Repetition of goats. An incorrect challenge.

Andy, you have 18 seconds, starting now. When you're up here and you're holding one of these in your hand and the dependencies you have are on your... Definitely 100% hesitation. Definitely hesitation. Sam, you have 17 points, 12 seconds remaining, starting now.

A further exhaustive list of computer tools might include... Icarus, Sun... Hesitation. Hesitation, absolutely correct.

Adam, you have 6 seconds and indeed 6 points, starting now. PHP, Ruby, Fortran... Deviation. Why? He just started listing programming languages. That's not talking about managing dependencies.

I'm afraid that is correct. You gain a point. Interesting. Okay, Sam, you have 2.4 seconds on managing dependencies, starting now. Managing dependencies is a thing... Repetition of thing.

I'm afraid I do have to give you that point, Andy. You have a tenth of a second remaining, starting now.

Okay, thank you very much for joining in my very favorite thing, RubyConf. You've been an amazing audience. It remains for me to thank Ian Mester, who created this game so many years ago, and Nicholas Parsons, who's been hosting it in the real world, where it's actually a proper thing,

is, thank you very much. I've been Andrew Faraday, and please join me once again for appreciating our panel. Adam Cuppy, Taurus Chernobylafuente, Sam Pippin, and today's win, Andy Kroll.