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I am a doctor... (TW)

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what about the of the of the of the of the of the and the and the and and mn the but I would like to mention and just as the programming on this talk about that in the program was flagged as a content warning in this talk I will be discussing some fairly understood in topics for some people it issues of depression suicide suicidal thoughts drug use and miscarriage will come up in the course of this conversation so if that is something that is likely to affect you in in a bad light and please be advised to take whatever control tonight
so my is russell I'm a 10 year veteran of the Jagger contain on a member of the gender Technical Advisory Board on President the gender suffer Foundation as a you just animals a
fan the work projects project looking at the tools we use to develop python because the where's toga
cross-platform widget toolkit that allows to build highways Android mobile apps in Python and be where Integra both works in progress and if you're interested in Python development tools were Python on mobile please come talk to me a
and the CTR and cofounder of a start-up company with low pressures and stresses that come along with that and this is not the and that kind of doctor um editors in computer science and my doctoral thesis was entitled levels of learning and development incoherence Stahl self-organizing feature maps and that's 3 and half years of not getting back I the reason I say this is the what I'm about to say is not medical advice it's personal anecdote if you find yourself being affected by any of the problems of about the start discussing please seek professional help don't rely upon me because I'm not a professional my hope is that by sharing what I've been going through I have because I was to go do something that I didn't do for a very very long time you may have noticed that I
had my fingers and of high it's i have a stressful job I volunteer agenda I've got side projects my side projects of sigh projects I have a son of seminal difficulties I have a daughter so I have a wife and unless you use the combination of the stressors of of these so detects tall the my temper
started to grow short I found myself getting really frustrated both with myself and with others I found myself genuinely doubting my own ablate at Brigham my own abilities not just impostor syndrome most of the underlying a genuine belief that I was incompetent my enthusiasm to go out and socialize with friends was almost completely removed picking up the phone to call friends to go over for dinner have them over for dinner felt like just too much effort to even be with I also had some intermittent have problems SIAM particular I assigned having will issues with my back and Sharon back muscles to the extent that I was spending sometimes 3 or 4 days later on the caption . up on some really really great opiates that learns and that's not a programmer productive situation yeah it was in constant it wasn't a continuous decline I had good days ahead bad days I had good I had bad works but this pattern that probably going going on in a serious way for fighting months and probably in the years before that that know this by I hit rock bottom for that week I would wake up in the morning and the only thing that got me out of bed was have I felt absolutely no jury in what I was doing in my anything in my life the only reason I was getting out of bed with 100 and contractual obligation the fact that when you might kids needed to be fed so as suppose that better get out of it and then on Wednesday I went into my office I started work and by about 9 30 August had no energy to continue I couldn't summon the energy to give a damn about anything I went back to bed I buried my head Michael Lo and I cried that was the final straw arrive as she pushed me out the door to go see a doctor a medical 1 and I was diagnosed as being in the middle of a major depressive episode now I am being treated now I am but it was the start of a treatment of Werhli for me to just declare victory but even in the short time the last couple of months of noticed a huge positive change at some level it's probably just the cathartic release of knowing the what I was feeling wasn't right and can be treated but frankly at this point out of that part the taken any improvement I could get the reason I'm going public is because in retrospect I put up getting help for far too long I mean 1 would need failure I didn't want to attract the stigma of admitting that I was mentally ill I did not see a doctor because of pride successful people don't get depressed successful people power firm successful people when as
Bill yeah Studies University greater depression affects at least 1 in 10 people in the general population hiring some demographics and guess what this is 1 of those demographics computers computer science and Pergamon people and industries particularly prone to tune the discussions of burnout elastic constant on the top I want every single
person in this room to not the you have a lot I am balanced every conceivable measure I can see if successful member of this community and I have depression now I've given a version of this talk is as a learning tool price now that was ejected from Europe provenance of came out as it were and once attack on about a month ago and was amazed me is that both times the number of people who served me out afterwards to think about being so because they had depression but I'm afraid to seek treatment when I had sought treatment of in telling what about it because of the shine and as shown that is quite literally in some cases and most of us I mean that quite literally people who could and should have been in this rented today but the other 10 years ago gender season contributions from some relevant is not in your garden on shorts you may know I'm from summaries other projects Redditch marked down he's activision work on so far I am never met and myself at the time isolated recognizing for the intellectual powerhouse city walls it was someone who contributed to the discussion agenda is I'm the was the major contributor to the magic removal discussions and the metal that objects that filter IPR design we have 2 days at least partially due to some of his feedback no gender really stuff and it was too much of an independence Burton often studies framework where applied and that 2 years after he was engaged gender community actively under a blog post and in the localities of the following I have a lot of illnesses on and talk about it much for a variety of reasons I feel ashamed to have an illness show that in times when you've been said that Solana's abandon your plan is gone horribly awry your face fold perhaps you cry you feel worthless you wonder whether it's worth going on everything you said you think about seems bleak the things you've done the things you hope to do the people around you you underlined brilliant and lots of depressed mood is like that only it doesn't come for any reason that doesn't go for any that said get some fresh air coming up with a lot of money don't feel any better I mean that certain being unable to fill the jury that everyone else seems to feel everything gets covered by the sentence and then in 20 a Tukey's online now it's really easy to reduce this to sign that the and was killed by the US attorney was mercilessly going after him for no good reason and to be sure malicious prosecution was part of all contribute to a situation that I wasn't right and took his own life he took his life because he was depressed and when you depressed forms of self-harm starts sounding like a good idea and is other people actually noticed is happening and after this about 6 I move was struggling but was also a passionate activist imagine we felt that we would see him through his talk period this is something we can ignore all hope that will go away this is as I said quite literally killing us and answers there unique over the last 2 years I've had conversations of at least 2 other prominent gender norms who have told me that the people in positions with this seriously considered so far I didn't have a maid maiden but we don't actually have a connection we share both is exactly 10 years younger than me now that's a really really dumb thing to fixate on on the grand scheme of things when I found out that he be really hot yeah the answer to that shock is on the data and found that any member of this community that I love so much for that the right side other something as simple as making sure there OK that but each never 1 of you don't ignore the sites don't put after getting help if you have a feeling that you might be depressed was suffering from burnout please seek help because you don't have to feel like this tonight and you have a problem won't make it any better the so I can get accepted you need help what does help look like well 1st of all it's important to get a good diagnosis if you're looking to just gonna put your toes in the world that you can do some of these tests on line 1 example is the Kate enters the psychological distress it's a bit like 1 of those which should be here I you pop quizzes but you have 4 wheels but pop quizzes ultimately no substitute for real diagnosis and there's no way to sugarcoat this you're going to need to see a professional they're going to administer some tests and some of them are actually very similar to the k 10 test and work out exactly what you've got because tonight and it's important to recognize that depression is very much a blanket term there are lots of different types of depression lots of different types of mental illness or was that noise is being in the middle of a major depressive episode my son who is 9 has what's called generalized anxiety disorder someone in the postpartum depression after giving birth or laughter miscarriage many of the symptoms of these here illnesses are similar and many of the treatments system similar as well but it's very important get a good diagnosis because well this similar they are distinct and the differences matter when it comes to treatment and sometimes just to complicate matters they are co you can have both depression and anxiety disorder so this trick that we can take a bunch of different firms and not mutually exclusive you can do many of them at once as a set of linear I'm not taking medication from other Persian and in western society this is often obviously 1 of the big 1st port of call 1 pill makes a bigger 1 pill makes you small but what are you thinking magic pill will fix your problems it watch but it can help you manage symptoms if what you have is episodic it can give you a bright the Kickstart it needs to start producing the right chemicals again some of them don't even need to be prescribed Syngenta is a horrible abstract it's available at health food shops in Australia epigenesis I'm you it's it's a very very mild anti-depressant that's strong enough that if you start taking something prescribed a prescribed in the present it's contraindicated pesos stocktaking syndromes world for a couple of days before you start taking his other drugs I use Jones where and after several years before I moved to the hard stuff and actually was hopeful during that period yeah the mentors is another supplement is available without prescription metonymy is a hormone that's important for regulating about a clock in some studies have found people suffering from depression have 1 autonomous systems that supplements may help so some people taking not and actually induces depression so be careful the and environment so there is a 1 of the things that even remotely serious do not rely on self-medication so the professional advice I mention those as simple so as you can try out if it's not that bad maybe you need a little bit of also keep an eye out for other forms of self-medication in particular alcohol and drug use it's really really easy to slip into the habit of getting drunk into you can't feel feelings anymore but that's not helping In fact is part of a problem if you used as a diagnostic criterion the same goes for of drugs I took it was drugs myself other than some really really fine it's for the according for that point but I don't have an idiot from last for the real problem if you start noticing a pattern of excessive alcohol or drug use in yourself seek help and if you see it in others intervene now close the hot stuff is the prescription medication but really the category of drugs used to manage person is generally that the exercise selective serotonin re-uptake inhibitors inhibitors the 1st set of these on the market they look fundamentally the same way they slightly differ metabolization processes some work for some people don't work for others I take left and I was really lucky it worked 1st time for me and the effect is both profound and quick as a matter of days the some people
can take weeks and for some people it doesn't work if you're issues and things that you might describe necessarily you might be point in the direction of incident that as a pain they work in a very similar kind like that and look at what if a white matter much better than an intermediate so intermediate treatment for onset anxiety symptoms and rather our which need of Iceland blood concentration to work dosage is also very important when I started I was on about half the dose that I am now and they did have a very dramatic effect on my mood I found that I was sitting on the couch completely calm and relaxed with my shoulders can stop around my neck all that strangely increasing the dosage of the medical right now you have to work with your doctor on these 2 in the right dosage the exercise was also have some very interesting side effects ranging from the but could add to the potentially dangerous they also have some very interesting interactions other commonly used medications especially as aspirin coding again my good friends coding will away the treatment doesn't just mean drugs there is a lot you can and should do it without even popping a pill get exercise now having me up here advocating exercises Merval hypocritical that I showed you get a lot more than I do but from a depression management of you it doesn't need to be vigorous exercise even tell you have certain that network each day can be enough and frankly just clearing your hate can be a wonderful thing of advantage of taking a rock is getting some sunshine exposure to spend some light stimulus production which plays another time in production which is the heart the budget chemical processes that this can be a problem for other reasons there is enough sunlight of some attitudes in Australia sums that he tried to you thank you very much the northern hemisphere for that that you can also suggested that therapy as with the final legible solutions there are many different forms of therapy as well to common ones that come up in a in a uh in discussions are cognitive behavioral therapy and acceptance and commitment therapy and which ones work for you know depends very much upon Iran had spice and how you tackle problems it's not 1 size fits all if you go to a therapist that the press doesn't seem to be working for you see that another therapist it it doesn't need to be professional help either just talking to a friend can be helpful burden shared is a burden the assessment of out there in the developers spent specifically this image front uh blue happens there's also a group with what a focus like beyond blue and black Institute to the in Australia um but much information that is here is applicable regardless of nationality and US Department of Health and had services also has mental health out of the provides some US centric information and if you not the but not the posts if you're well-adjusted happy individual will 1st off you here sorry liars the this seriously on incredibly happy for your job now is to make sure that everyone else around you is OK the if you've never been depressed or it may be very difficult to understand exactly what's going on so let's be clear about that depression is and what depression is depression isn't being said it's not something you can just snap out of it is that have but it's not just a friend of mine or removed is the brain being broken and broken limbs broken parts of the body you actually a good analogy here follows the bright my late November tended to shake it off they considered that having a broken leg everybody gets you know broken leg sometimes not understand that it's painful what has actually been broken I'm going to need use crux allow get around you might need to hold symbols open for me for b and you know I'm not abandon that preventable medical bungee jumping with you and that's a particularly bad right I might not ever be out review some of the activities of are what's injury the if some and users they have depression but not signing this said this sign that blind is broken and they need your help assistance and understanding to heal another analogy the telephone explaining mental illnesses is what's called spoon theory last month was 1st described by Christine India and sending out and she was using it in the context of having lupus but section analogy that holds for many disabilities including mental illness and the took me things like anxiety disorders Spencer goes something like this imagine you have in your hands a handful of 20 students in early on a cutlery you can use to eat all that when you use when you throw away now you have 2 8 3 times a day and sometimes not have snack surfer happy life you need at least 3 and maybe 5 standard be nice to have the every time we do something challenging during your diet cost you spoon result that challenge given out in the best that costs a spring you need to adapt to a lasting a change of plans that cost a suspect after well-adjusted individual you got things space bones even under worst I it's hard to think that you might use up always produce the leading 3 squares interest next but if you're going to allow for the major disability your major mental illness you don't have 15 spare spends donor ability cost you spread during the factor sums just west issues again that costs book going to a house in the morning can constitute craft spoon supply so you spend your entire lashing aspens making decisions about the things you can and can't do even though you'd like to and costs because it's sometimes you compare spoons from to marriage but then assigned to Morrison down unexpected things always happen so you need to have a couple spinning reserve that's why some of the things that you might want to send someone with depression just aren't helpful but not even when all they completely missing the nature of the problem thank you will get better you don't have it so bad as if someone was often you stop being so negative demand well this isn't about feelings it's about a major mental condition is about someone's blind being broken and I was is making right the situation casually referring to a desired have the desk is being OCD could have something slightly unusual is crazy there appear to have actual of civilian it's not a joking matter that people matter there with serious mental illnesses reducing everyone with the mental illness for punch line is really no better than reducing all women the sex objects the so what can you do no be for people it looks is though some of you having a bad time to be for them and ask if there OK there might not want to talk about but then much and if they don't having some us is a sign that you connected to the world and that can be a really good thing when you're in a doctor all but so except that you're not going to fix them a five-minute chat about someone's problems isn't gonna make the depression going right environment would fix the broken leg you're not that it's going to give them a spear that a sometimes as a supplement taking charge of the situation 1 of the big symptoms for me that I mentioned is that I lost with enthusiasm for organizing social outings the effort involved in picking up the phone suggesting Hanan which should come to watch a movie was a spoon I didn't have but you can provide that's about it since it has come out of the picture much a movie about the work done because connecting with friends makes you feel good and that you good to get out and sent to the summit of what was going on and so you might need to learn what we shall summon up the dual method as easy as possible exponentially as possible for them to do something that's good for them and so that doesn't mean you spend an evening playing therapist it just means an meaning of taking someone's mind of things it's not come out and talk about the problems it's come out and be with us come and connect with us can never be humorous
so that's where I went to say unsolvable such a down note about the entity and what is being such a fantastic conference so here's a picture of a key the reason I have done this is because I suffer from depression and getting help for far too long the reason that did that our own in retrospect doubt and they're really easy to fix we need to talk about this I love this community I love every once in and I don't think that someone else is going through I went through with it can be treated it can get better we just have to care about 1 another and broke the stigma that makes people ashamed to admit they've got a problem thank
you very much the few but and that would be at the time of the of the of the genes
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Titel I am a doctor... (TW)
Serientitel DjangoCon US 2015
Teil 24
Anzahl der Teile 46
Autor Keith-Magee, Russell
Mitwirkende Confreaks, LLC
Lizenz CC-Namensnennung 3.0 Unported:
Sie dürfen das Werk bzw. den Inhalt zu jedem legalen Zweck nutzen, verändern und in unveränderter oder veränderter Form vervielfältigen, verbreiten und öffentlich zugänglich machen, sofern Sie den Namen des Autors/Rechteinhabers in der von ihm festgelegten Weise nennen.
DOI 10.5446/32769
Herausgeber DjangoCon US
Erscheinungsjahr 2015
Sprache Englisch

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