The Bastard Operator From Hell enjoys abusing his users. SystemTap allows for very easy dynamic code injection system-wide (kernel, libraries, applications). This talk gives a brief overview of what is SystemTap and its capabilities. We then demonstrate how it can be used to dynamically insert questionable code at any level to spy on users and modify behaviours of applications and system components very easily. This is not about novel techniques or breaking trust boundaries (we assume you are root already). This is only about making things easier for both the good and the bad guys.