Wellness aesthetics and glossy technological interfaces share an appeal of convenience. Health apps cater to our wish to wellbeing. #grateful is a popular hashtag on instagram. There is a solution to everything. We all strive to be happy. Look into the mirror - you can make it. In this performative dialogue we analyze the wellness aesthetic and associated technologies, images and narratives - and how they make us pretty unwell as a society (including some guilty pleasures and beautiful pictures).